Dear dad: As much as you think your son is useless, then he will be that useless. You're not the only one that has limit to everything. I do too. Rmb how you used to verbally abused me in Sec 1 ? That's why I talked bad about you to the tuition teacher. If you ever ever seeing this, I just want you to know that that period of time, I wanted to die so much that I overdosed myself with pills. I'm not asking for your emphaty, nor am I asking for your attention, but I'm just simply asking you to know that I really am about to snap. I won't hesitate on another qttempt, given that youll push me once more... Once again, FUCK YOU.

Everytime i look up on the news or something, there will always be news on people that passed away, both intentionally, and not. And then i asked myself - when is my turn?

Life's been shit.Really shitty. Really cant find anyone that i'll feel comfortable to rant to. Really cant find anyone that's able to give me the support that i need. I have so many friends, but i still, feel so lonely. Maybe i'm fated to be this way. Maybe if one day, i disappear, i guess, no one will notice it anyway. They may even be happier perhaps. Maybe to then, i'm just another pest. A cockroach. A rat. You name it. Why is moving on, and being strong is so hard? When that's already bad enough, more and more problems start to appear. It's so... Demoralising... And still, i cant find the support that i need. I really starting to feel that leadership camps arent going to supply the motivations that i'll need. Really no point. I really wonder, what has God seen in me. Why not, He just give my soul to someone in Africa or something. At least they'll be able to use it wisely. Really. Really no point in looking forward to another day in life. Everyday is like, just another day of pretending. Really really. Really tired of pretending at times. But maybe, i have begun pretend lesser? Yeah. I guess, this blog is the only thing i can rant to... Afterall, i'm all by myself right..? But honestly, i guess no one is gonna ever respond to my call for help. No one.